Sunday, November 11, 2012


Heather smiled when she overheard Angela saying, "Howard, you walk around acting as if you are a living legend in your own mind."

"Yes I do," said Howard W. Campbell, III, son of the illustrious time traveler Howard W. Campbell, Jr. Howard's agreement sent a reverberation through her body with the jolt of realization of an unrequited urgency when her indictment was taken as: yes. Howard continued, "My best selling PDF called FREEbookWORTHreading.doc explains my approach to FaceBook branding. It's called Legendary Branding because I haven't gotten anyone else to play me, yet." He wrinkled his forehead with a tilt to the left, "Actualy, that's not such a bright idea. I just want a vacation from this stage, and I'd like to hand the stage over to somebody for a while."

It's tough writing about myself in the 3rd Person.

And so begins the science fiction novel...

The Autobiography of an Inattentional Magician

By Howard W. Cambell, III

We are amongst fewer than two-dozen tourists being asked to move along as we are guided inside the United $tates $enate corridors.

Our tour guide Judy puts a little extra chi in the human accent with which she delivers memorized quotes from a script surely written by some intern, who went to some website that might as well have been called Senate Fun Facts & Fnords...

"Ever since 1728, every state has two—and only two—Senators, each Senator represents a vastly different number of people. For example, each Senator from Wyoming (our least populace state) represents 246,981 residents, whereas each Senator from California (our largest state by population) represents 18,378,333 constituents." It's like I'm waking up to new reality on these excursions with Angela. There's no context, and then she does theatre, ala Medium Cool, the 1969 American film my mom took me to see when I was one-years-old, a cinema vérité-style documentary combining fictional and non-fictional content, a movie the United States National Film Registry and the Library of Congress both label as being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant".

Angela dropped serious dollars to pull off this scene for her zombie movie: Do Zombies Dream of Electric Sheeple, an inquiry into entertaining ourselves and the decline of the west, and believe IT or Not, iT's a comedy. Angela hooked us both up on a White House VIP tour. We aren't being sheepled.

Heather and I don't know what Angela has planned. This is exciting. Gar :-) And Judy is enhancing our anticipation by being barely sexy, perhaps more properly reported as sleightly burlesque, "According to Senate rules, flowers are not permitted in the Senate chamber, except on the desk of a deceased sitting Senator on the day of his eulogy."

Judy has the body of a trophy wife, and the confidence that rarely comes without poll dancing. She appears to me as though she'd be an exuberant aide, and won't go off talking points. She flirts attention my way with Heather. That sexes up a room for bigger sales with platform selling, in other words, she'll be a profitable addition to our circus should she escort some R&R business our way. Don't read me wrong. We don't trick. Don't come to our house to get laid like that. Circus house is about visual entertainment, without contact, unless you are taking one of our acro yoga classes.

Heather & I help Eli & Pearl maintain Circus House's positive currency, as reflected in the direction of our cash flow. Rising financial tides help all of us in Circus House.

What we've all been discovering, back home in Ashevile, North Carolina, in our home many call Circus House, is that running a circus is largely about being consummate hosts, and forgiving and letting go, and being mindful of now, as we regularly steer a new trajectory. We consciously re-traject towards what appears to us as a better tomorrow.

In Circus House, if I may generalize, we tend to speak living, by sometimes, by way of short-handing our philosophy through the words and images of R. Buckminster Fuller, P.T. Barnum and pre-Constantine Jesus. So hear it goes...

"Be confident, without pulling the wool over your eyes. A lot of people have remained poor, or ruined themselves, because of this destructive tendency. These people see a sure success in every undertaking, which is why they stick to nothing, abandoning one business after another. The fable about the hunter who sells the bearskin before he shoots the bear shows that this tendency goes a long way back. Unfortunately, the fable and experience have not cured people of the habit." ~ P.T. Barnum

P.T. Barnum's philosophy... Now, that quote is great, in my opinion. Can we agree that's far more interesting than more Senate Fun Facts?

It's not Judy's fault she has to say these scripted phrases instead of talking with us. She gestures to a statue, perhaps intentionally modeling Wheel of Fortune's legendary master of the sexy hand flourish, Miss Vanna White. Judy smiles, and says, "As per the U.S. Constitution, Senators were elected by each state legislature until the 17th Amendment, ratified in 1912, allowed for direct election by the voters in each state."

Their are three hot women in our pack who are feeding me energy. Heather and I are presenting ourselves as a couple, separate from Angela and Jared, Angela's videographer and in real life she is one of his fag hags.

One of the many things I admire about Angela when I'm not distracted by the radiance of her body, is her dedication to her art.

Whatever you do, do it ardently. If necessary, get used to getting up early and going to bed late. Never leave any stone unturned. And if you only have one hour to work with, make sure that what you do in that hour is perfectly done. The old proverb makes a lot of sense: ‘What is worth doing is worth doing well.’ Energy and patience in business are two indispensable elements of success.
P T Barnum

We turn a corner, and instead of going up to the balcony, the guard leads us down the hall with the arrow saying... Senate Floor. I have a feeling this is Angela's stage. Heather, sensing me, or figuring it out separately, starts video taping our walk, and I follow her lead. Heather says heartfeltly, "what a wonderful video taping opportunity" and I see two more people start recording video.

Onto the empty senate floor, with darkened extremities. When I see Jared separate from Angela, I glide Heather and I behind her, creating distance so we can get good, usable video. This is game on. Jared walked to the far side of where we are allowed.

I say to the rest of the folks on our tour, "Look!"

Angela smiles, and says to the Senate Floor, "In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire, for a safe and secure society which I assure you will last for ten thousand years."

Our senate fills with to what extent 15 people can produce enormous applause.

Heather turns to me and says, "So this is how liberty dies... with thunderous applause."